July 20th, 2012 
Emily 
I have a nostalgia problem. In my memory, events from the past are happier, more fun, and more rewarding than they really were. And as a trailing spouse, this nostalgia is something I am always trying to overcome.
I am generally happy with my life, but on the off-days, when I’m feeling a little depressed, I tend to glorify past jobs, past experiences, and the former places where we’ve lived. It’s a dangerous habit. The constant comparison reinforces my depression and the idea that I’m not better off in my current situation.
Luckily, I have a few strategies to keep my nostalgia firmly rooted in reality:
I remind myself that life is full of ups and downs. Sure, it’s annoying that we don’t have a car in Nairobi, but at the same time, we get to travel (by taxi) to amazing national parks each weekend to see wildlife.
My spouse reminds me that the grass wasn’t greener on the other side. I’ll glorify the merits of my old job, and he’ll say, “Yeah, but remember when you had to work 12 hour days and go in on the weekends and it was so exhausting that you never wanted to do anything fun.” Good point.
I get busy doing something fabulous. Sometimes, I just need to distract myself, maybe by taking a kiswahili class, or starting a blog. If I can ground myself in the present, then I can stop dwelling on the past.
This week in particular, I’ve been thinking a lot about the past because it’s time for my 10-year high school reunion. (And for obvious reasons, I won’t be able to attend.) But I keep reminding myself that while high school was great, it’s not nearly as great as living in Kenya with the man I adore.
How do you stay grounded in the present?
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I love reading about all your travel. We’ll miss you at the reunion but you are definitely having some amazing experiences!
Thanks for reading, and great job organizing everything. I can’t imagine having to organize such a huge event!
I suffer from nostalgia myself too. Staying grounded in the present, on the things I need to address now, really helps. And counting my blessings, which are abundant, if I just stop to remember!
Yeah, I need to practice counting my blessings more too!
If I find myself dwelling on the past I typically try to focus on the future and what I need to do right now to get me to where I want to be.
I have that trouble too. I don’t know if it’s the best method, but I attempt to take off the rose colored glasses and remember that not all of it was good.
I think rose colored glasses are perfect for the present, but must be removed when thinking about the past! Good strategy!